Befriend Your Mind
Techniques that bond
I’ve been meditating for a few years now (somewhat messily, I might add), and have recently come to the fruition that I have finally found my nirvana within such task.
When I first began, I perceived meditation as something to calm the mind in the sense of ceasing all thought entirely — as you can guess, I never achieved this and grew even more angsty while amidst.
Why can’t I just stop thinking?
I’m a little embarrassed to admit…it took me some time to understand that thoughts are endlessly indefinite.
I recently began perceiving meditation as a means of creating a bond with the mind in place of attempting to control it.
It’s often explained that meditation is a task in which you learn to control the mind in order to veer from the opposing: the mind controlling you.
Though, I’m not too fond of the word control in any situation, as I feel controlling often tends to lead to contrasted results to those initially desired.
A friendship, however, creates a bond, therefore easeful tranquility and harmony in desired results.
Today, I want to share with you the meditation techniques that I’ve learned [and altered to my needs] over time that have created a stronger bond between my mind and I — where I can go about my days, aware of thought or not, and still find comfort in knowing I’m able to lighten the unfavorable that may arise while accentuating enlightenment more often in a gentle, serene manner:
Count in a different language
I usually use this technique in the mornings, as it stimulates more awareness since not entirely having each number (and their order) subconsciously engraved in mind.
Counting my breaths in English was far too simple — practically mindless — in which I’d find my mind wandering into deep territory of rumination without conscious awareness of when such loss took place.
Counting backwards in French, however, maintains my focus on the counting, therefore what I’m counting to begin: my breath.
Music
I have a specific playlist I use for meditation, not merely because the songs chosen are on the more serene side of the melodic spectrum, but also because I use it to stimulate my brain to adhere this specific playlist to letting go and focus.
Which, I can tune into any time of day needed!
Aside from the playlist alone, a technique I use alongside music is imagery.
I mainly do this when I’m stretching, as I find it difficult to still my mind when my body is in motion.
I picture an illuminated string, similar to a guitar string, beginning at the tip of my head or tip of my feet, flowing to the opposing side.
As the music plays on, the string flows according to its beat —for example, if the bass become more prominent at a certain point, I picture the string growing as a quicker flow to the next portion of my body; in the calmer parts of the songs, I allow the string to follow its natural order in its time.
Once the string has illuminated my entire body within, I let the string become carried by the melody itself, as the soundwaves flux alongside every beat.
I’ll soon begin to notice where in my body and/or mind may feel more tense in certain areas and focus the string there, allowing them to relax within the imagined soundwaves.
Mostly, I use this technique at night, as I’ve noticed it causes me to become weary thereafter.
Get in touch with nature
Now, this doesn’t necessarily require physically engaging with the great outdoors, more so mentally.
With this, I’ll listen to a playlist of nature sounds of my choosing and attempt to create the scenery within.
It always reminds me of Richard in Eat, Pray, Love, when he said: The meditation room is within, Groceries*, decorate that!
*If you’ve never seen this movie, not only do I highly recommend doing so as soon as possible (not to be dramatic, but it changed my entire life), I also must mention that Richard is referring to the main character, Liz, as a nickname of Groceries.
I always like to listen to birds and a babbling brook, picturing a far-off waterfall leading to where I peacefully leisure before such eager waters; amidst emerald grass, countless butterflies gently float by and throughout even more endless rows of trees abundant in fresh fruit, surrounded by lively flowers to comfort their surfaced roots.
Naming
In the morning, I love to use this technique as a reminder, at night, as a clearing of my slate.
With this technique, I’ll begin, of course with my eyes shut, take a deep inhale, followed by an equally tranquil exhale, and begin naming facts as I bring the evidence to mind:
I am sitting in my room, safely in my solitude.
I just made my bed.
Elliot is lying by my side. (Elliot is a cat)
I am going to have lavender creamer in my coffee today.
And after I state a few facts to ground myself in the here and now, I begin to state what I’m currently working on with myself and what I did/what happened that went well recently:
I am working on pausing longer before speaking and being mor conscious amidst conversation.
I am working on finding patience with my negative emotions.
And things along the lines of:
I returned that long overdue library book.
I bought my sister a coffee today.
I saw two monarchs playing with each other on a walk this morning.
The sun was out and its finally starting to feel like fall.
This helps keep my thoughts well-rounded and neutralized towards myself and the external in a nonjudgmental manner.
“Inhale, friend, exhale, friend”
This is a concept I learned in The Self-Talk Workout, by Rachel Goldsmith Turow.
I love this technique for various reasons, one being that it’s helpful in using lighter self-talk, as you speak to yourself in a harmonious term (friend), stating that you are on your own side.
This mere saying, inhale, friend, exhale, friend, while following the direction alongside, also helps with automatically slowing down your breath.
In her book, Rachel Goldsmith Turow mentions this technique can be used rather freely — at any given time, in any situation, and has no requirement of how long it must be engaged with.
I mostly use this technique when I’m engaging with a mindless task (such as making my bed), to keep my mind on the surface of the rabbit hole of thought.
It’s also great to use as grounding when you find yourself overwhelmed.
Let go
As I mentioned, it’s difficult to still the mind when our bodies are physically active.
Other times when I find myself amidst a mindless activity —putting away laundry, stretching, deep cleaning, etc. — before I submerge myself, I acknowledge that I will let my mind go by allowing it to wander freely.
Acknowledging that I am setting my mind free puts me in a conscious mindset to lightly graze each thought and with the least amount of judgement.
This helps me see what thoughts are constant and automatic and how I can go about re-writing them to make them more well-rounded and helpful than detrimental.
I often feel as though my previous perception of meditation hindered me from obtaining its ceaseless benefits.
I also narrowed my techniques to those of others, forgetting that my mind and mental needs differ from theirs.
Though, once I desire to work alongside my mind in lieu of against, and altered some techniques that fit my constant chatter, the bliss I’d so often set out to seek, found me.
